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The Christmas tree was made more beautiful with “alterations.”

Why Caruso’s Park Grass Remains Green

By LOLA COFFEY

Special to Circling the News

A Palisades resident I know is amused by the towering Christmas tree on Caruso’s green patch in Palisades Village. Apparently, some limbs that were too thick had to removed, and then, in areas where the branches were sparse, holes were drilled into the trunk and spare branches were nailed back on the tree to fill those holes.

My friend said it’s “not natural, sort of a Frankenstein tree.” Well, we have plastic surgeons to take care of saggy boobs and drooping eye lids, so I applaud the specialists who can make unattractive trees feel better about themselves.

I like the cosmetically-perfect tree and Santa’s little house in Caruso’s park, but I worry about the grass.

I had been wondering how it stayed so green and then I saw someone paint it. I asked the guard how often it’s done. He told me about once a month. Sort of like getting one’s hair colored to hide the gray

Who knew grass could be painted? On the internet I found that one can make “grass paint” with Epsom salt, fertilizer and green food coloring. But the label warned, “To avoid staining yourself green, wear gloves, a facemask, goggles and protective clothing when spraying.”

Fortunately, instead of trying to mix the paint yourself, there are companies that sell it. One company wrote, “Lawn paint is formulated to be biodegradable and safe for the environment. Once the lawn paint dries, the painted turf is safe for children and pets.”

Precautions included: “It is recommended that you wear protective eyewear, gloves and a breathing mask as the product can irritate some individuals. Do not spray with others present unless they are also protected.

“Since accidental overspray can occur, it is recommended to have a bucket of soapy water available with a nylon or light [barbecue-style] wire brush to remove any overspray on concrete, etc. Windex also works very well at removing product that was applied accidentally to any hard surface, such as concrete or bricks.”

I couldn’t find the ingredients in the commercial product, but I did find the ecological information. “Eco-toxicity: No data available, however the material is not expected to have any deleterious toxic effect. Environmental Fate: No data available regarding the environmental fate or biodegradation.”

There was a section on hazards. “May cause respiratory tract, eye and skin irritation. Potential Acute Health Effects: Eyes: Short-term harmful effects are not expected. However, irritation may develop causing itching and redness. Skin: Short-term harmful effects are not expected. However, mild skin irritation may develop causing itching and redness. Inhalation: Short-term harmful effects are not expected. However, exposure to vapors or mist may cause coughing or wheezing when inhaled. Ingestion: Not an intended route of exposure. Short-term harmful effects are not expected. However, may upset the gastrointestinal tract and cause diarrhea. “

If it’s being sprayed, I guess it appears to be safe. But then at one time smoking was considered safe, and even healthy, because it helped one relax. Experts said plastics were entirely safe, and now it appears the excess plastic is killing not only sea life, but also affecting male fertility (low sperm count in young men).

So, who knows what’s really safe or not? But, I have the perfect solution. Keep Santa’s house. Take down the tree and add another little house and then put a third house in the remainder of the park.

Three houses eats up the grass space, which means kids and dogs cannot get on the lawn and eat the painted grass.

This could help Councilman Mike Bonin as well, because after the holiday season the town would have three affordable housing units for the homeless, and Rick Caruso would make money through Section 8 housing vouchers.

Win! Win! Win!

Heavy use on Caruso’s Village Park makes it hard to keep the grass pristine.

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